Alternative Dialog for The Cold

Okay, so here’s how I would have written that dialog in The Cold, although I have to admit it would not have made such good TV. Though it may have saved a few of us from putting our fists through our screens.

JOSH: I... want to apologize for this morning. I’m sorry. It was inappropriate.
DONNA: Don’t worry about it.
JOSH: Really?
DONNA: Seriously. It was bound to happen sometime.
JOSH: You think?
DONNA: Sure. Don’t worry about it. (She starts to walk away)
JOSH: Why do you think that is?
DONNA: What?
JOSH: That it was bound to happen sometime?

(Donna walks back towards him)

DONNA: You know what my favorite movie is, right?
JOSH: When Harry Met Sally... "a man and a woman can’t be friends because the sex part always gets in the way".
DONNA: (pleasantly surprised) Hey – you’ve remembered something I’ve taught you.
JOSH: You know, sometimes I do listen to you.
DONNA: Not often enough.
JOSH: Yeah. I’m a jackass sometimes.
DONNA: (smiling) Sometimes, yes.
JOSH: So why do you put up with me?
DONNA: It’s because of how handsome you are. And powerful. Remember?
JOSH: Donna, please don’t mess with me. I’m totally lost here.
DONNA: I’m only half messing. You are handsome. You are powerful. You’re also caring and sensitive and talented and passionate and inspiring and a million other things.
JOSH: Donna...
DONNA: So it was bound to happen sometime.
JOSH: You don’t think it’s because we’re meant to be together?
DONNA: Oh, Josh.
JOSH: I’m really asking you here.
DONNA: I don’t know what you want me to say.
JOSH: I want... I want... I want you... to...
DONNA: Josh. Are you really that blind?
JOSH: I’m a man, Donna. I need you to teach me a thing or two about the ways of love, remember?
DONNA: (smiles fondly at the memory) Yes.
JOSH: You want to be wooed. I remembered that too.
DONNA: Yes. So I’ll be expecting flowers and compliments. Especially after all the ones I've just handed you...
JOSH: You want me to woo you?
DONNA: You, or a hot Republican... doesn’t much matter who.
JOSH: Donna, please stop messing with my head.
DONNA: I’m sorry. Years of using humor as a defense mechanism. Years of...
JOSH: Of?
DONNA: Having to hide this.
JOSH: You shouldn’t have hidden it.
DONNA: Because?
JOSH: Because then we could have had a few more years of this... (kisses her tenderly; she puts her arms around him and kisses him back... )